Who is fooling who?



Dear chubby chasers

No pity party here.

Amused. The word I use to describe my outlook on today’s society as pertains to weight. We now reside in a world of extremes… you either are pro extremely thin, or extremely fat. Being in between is too mainstream and normal never excited anyone.

So here we are, or rather, here I am. Shamelessly cheering for the team that has more to the bone. I understand there is a club that finds pleasure in mingling with the chub team… the so called chubby chasers (It should be called chubby feeders or chubby cuddlers because we cannot run… not that far anyway).  I however do understand what it is they see, and why associating with a thick girl will be nothing but corporeal.

Thing is, we know we are fat, believe me we do. Some have been all their lives, others found themselves here. We have been the butt of every joke, we have been scorned and  harangued to lose weight. We have lived to tell the tale.

By the time you interact with a thick sister, you will be swimming in positive vibes! Despite all the negative attention, we have dealt with it, and come out tops. Also, the fact that we seldom suffer Hypoglycemia does help keep the bitchy at bay.

This is Gakenia , true to her name she makes everyone happy! She is hands down the nicest person I know, with a big heart and an even bigger rack, this girl has lived through it all and now… the world is her run way.

Fatbashers please take a seat, Gakenia is curve approved!

Gakenia 2

She is sassy….watch out now!

Gakenia 3

What I see here is a “kiss my chubby ass!” pose…

Gakenia 4

Bold… doesn’t only come in colours.


i CAN’T deal!

Where is the rewind button for this day?

I have suffered a day marred by failure.

I do not mind doing something and failing, far from it. What I cannot deal with is the feeling that tags at my being and drains me. That emotion that feels like the grey area between wakefulness and the twilight zone. That heady sensation that links straight to the pit of your stomach, and pulls at your innards so you feel like retching but you can’t, because the emotion is not real. Still you can’t shake it. It won’t leave you.


The worst emotion of all time.

When you attend 4 consecutive interviews and you receive nothing but  glowing compliments on your achievement and amazing potential. Only to receive a letter of regret from the same people who assured you of success. They hired a person with less potential and limited ambition, and far less experience and credentials. Disappointment.

You have dated for close to five years. Moved in together. Have a savings account together. Seen various plots where you will build your future home. Picked out names for your unborn children. You are definitely getting married. And then you don’t. You find yourself single. It happened too quickly, and you cannot retrace your steps. He marries someone else, and yes, your brilliant plans are executed by her. Disappointment.

You switch from using the pill to something more reliable and at least 99% success rate. The pills made you fat, and you were not consistent in taking then on Saturday mornings. The doctor said you may experience a change in your flow, may be heavier, maybe lighter, but it will pan out after 3 months. What you got instead was no period at all. Because the two bars signify an invasion that you were avoiding.  Disappointment.

You are late for a meeting, and traffic does not make sense. Three cars and two matatus ahead of you make a U turn and take a different route. If only time could stand still for an hour so you can get to your meeting without having sweated your foundation away. Two more cars make the U turn. What the hell, you do the same and swerve into the opposite lane gunning for the “chochoro” that will save you 40 minutes in transit. Just as you turn, a cop on a bike appears in your rear view mirror. He signals for you to stop, and you know you are in deep sh*t. He looks approachable and is in high spirits. Your low cleavage and coquettish laughter is not working as it usually does. You offer him a bribe, and he declines. Because it is the holy month and he is fasting. Your case will be heard on Monday. Disappointment.

If you identify with any of these scenarios, then you know how I am feeling.

If you’ll excuse me, I need to go talk to a man about a dog, one from Tennessee!


*chochoro is a short cut, usually down a dark dangerous ally.


Image credits.


what’s not to love?

Have you ever watched a drunk man sell his sobriety? When he tries to cover his slur with an accent, often American, only to come off slightly mad and more drunk than he actually is?

Have you ever watched a girl in heels that are out of her comfort zone? As she tries to maintain her natural equilibrium only to come across like a drunken antelope running towards danger instead of away from it.

Have you ever seen anxiety dressed in a grey suit and dark tan leather boots, all neatly tied together by a loosened red neck tie and presented in a tasty musky cologne. It all looks very appealing until a shaking lip and slight tremor of a nervous hand presents the true position.


We have become masters of disguise, polishing our exterior and presenting perfection, because vanity is everything.

We all posses flawless skin, firm thighs, perky breasts, deep baritones, never receding hairlines, more testosterone than an Arabian race horse;  on IG at least.

But how do we deal with the reality of who we are, and the disappointments that present themselves in bodies that refuse to comply to internationally accepted standards of beauty?

I have heard it said time and again… that there is nothing more appealing in a woman than her confidence. These here ladies exude it in truck loads! To see women who are comfortable in their skin, accept their “flaws” and make no apologies for the space they occupy has been nothing short of a beautiful high!

They are raw!

Raw skin

Raw figures

Raw flaws

Raw confidence

Allow me to introduce you to Emmah…a beautiful woman who has a bounce in her walk that will bring a tear to your eye (in a good way). Bold , confident and not apologetic….this one is the one to watch!

I welcome you to feast your eyes!

Ema 3

How the light dances on her skin…

Ema 4

Comfortable in her own skin….

ema 1

Life is too short to wear boring heels!

Emmah is also…



Image credits : More Kodhek