It must be the weather.
Got me in a pensive mood, endless cups of sweet coffee wrapped up in my fuzzy leopard print snuggie is not doing the trick today.
Mmmmmh, I cannot seem to gather my thoughts. Perhaps if my eldest wasn’t unwell, my spirits would be higher. His little nose is red, reminds me of Christmas..what is that carol with Rudolf and his red nose? He won’t eat, not even his favourite snack… cookies and warm milk. Sigh! This is terrible.
He sniffles and turns his watery eyes towards me.
“Mama…am I sick because I refused to wear socks when you told me to?”
Bless his little soul, the early onsets of “your choices have consequences” taking residence. But no, this is not the cause of his illness. I explain it had nothing to do with it, he must have caught a virus from school.
He still looks at me;
“ Mama… I won’t do it again, I will dress warmly so I get better.”
Oh! He is so sweet! A plant a kiss on his forehead, and tuck him in a little tighter, as if the cold would not find him if all corners were secured.
I see regret on his face, he believes that playing outside without shoes and walking inside without his socks caused him this pain. At his tender age, he feels troubled by his choice and wishes he could undo it.
Yes, regret, an emotion felt early in life. But only recognized later, and effects become stronger as one grows bolder.
If I could, I would have my children remain as children. Protect them from ugly people with sick intentions. Hide them from the harshness of truth, and wrap them with the only emotion God intended…love.
Face your regrets, knowing that you do not live in your past.